


it was us, it was always us

by scrawnycatra



Category: It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-10-03
Updated: 2019-10-03
Packaged: 2020-12-01 19:41:45
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,349
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20877863
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/scrawnycatra/pseuds/scrawnycatra
Summary: mac wants to tell dennis he loves him, dennis would rather die than hear it





	it was us, it was always us

**Author's Note:**

> originally posted on tumblr :) hence the lowercase shit lol

after the dust settles and the married couple are gone for good (neither of them can remember their last names, or even bothered asking), dennis finds himself boiling a cup of tea. normally, this would be a beer, or, hell, several gallons of hard liquor situation, to help drown it all out. to forget. to push deep down where their own ears are deaf to the burrowing guilt. they still feel guilt, right?

tried to break up a couple. who they thought were falling apart because the husband cheated on a guy named teddy, but it turns out teddy was the name of their dead leukemia son and greg isn’t even gay.

or well. he could be gay. we don’t know that. 

his mind diverts to the gurgling of their old kettle, screaming from its spout, old and crying for reprieve. he thinks of the sounds of lisa crying, echoing down the halls, this experience piling onto her grief and pain no doubt. he isn’t sure he felt all that bad. awkward, sure. but if he really felt so bad he wouldn’t be drinking tea. mac didn’t seem all that affected either though, so he thinks he’s in the clear. people die everyday, right? people’s kids die too. it only really hurts if it happens to you.

“hey, you want tea?” dennis settles down at their table, mac is seated on one of their yellow chairs. the question is pretty much rhetoric, he thinks. mac is only here because he wants some of whatever dennis was making. or he’s here to be with dennis, so he might as well have some tea while he’s at it. dennis pours carefully into their cups. the steam is kinda stinging on his knuckles. maybe he should’ve tricked mac into doing this.

“i was thinking about you.”

“huh?” dennis sets down the kettle. he has no idea what mac is talking about.

“when i was. talking to greg. tryna get him to date me, fuck me, fall- i don’t know,” he sighs, almost despondent now.

“what’s…” dennis stops. his throat catches because he now has a little inkling of _what._ “uh.”

“i don’t know, man, i don’t know. i watched all those rom-com movies-”

“yeah, i know.” he knows because they watched them all together. every chummy, over-the-top, cliched as hell rom-com. they saw so many of them, because mac said he never saw them before because he thought men couldn’t watch those movies because that would be gay. but he’s gay now, so. no reason not to. and dennis sat and watched with him, made recommendations, too. didn’t think about the implications of all that. he sure as hell is thinking now. “those movies- that’s what gave you the idea for the scheme.” 

“i guess. i keep thinking, dude. like, when i watch those movies, i think about you.”

dennis is almost angry. they had an equilibrium here. they had an understanding again, he thought. they’d be normal, they’d be friends, dennis doesn’t point it out when mac is staring at him a second too long, mac stops trying to explain why he stares. mac stops trying to redefine who they are, what they mean to each other. 

“mac-”

“every time i talked about, about leading men, leading ladies, making the perfect rom-com in real life, talking about love, that was all you, man. i said it, cuz, i was thinking about you.” 

“don’t say it-” dennis begs, eyes downcast. “please don’t say it.”

“why not, dennis?” he is exasperated. “because, i mean, i _tried._ i wanted to let go, believe me-” he points-”but you know how you were like. you didn’t give a shit about lisa. i couldn’t pay you to fuck her-”

“that’s because you have no money-”

mac almost laughs at that, and it’s a good thing he does, because it quells his anger and he sits back down, slumped and drained, but he sits back down. “i don’t think you even like women anymore. so why can’t you like me?”

“that’s ‘cause you’re annoying,” he thinks, he thinks maybe, if he keeps deflecting, keeps throwing quips and catching cheap laughs from mac, maybe he will drop this. oh, please. _please _let him drop this. 

“you don’t really think that. not for the most part.”

“oh, but i do.”

“fine, then i’ll leave right now,” mac stands up again, tries to find some thing to throw into something, like shirts into a bag, but he comes up empty. he raises his voice to compensate. “i’ll move out, just like you wanted! you want me to leave dennis? you wanna sit here in this apartment alone, lying to your goddamn self?”

“mac, sit down.”

“say you want me to stay.”

“no.”

“then i’m leaving,” he tries to move to his room now. oh god, he hates this. his tea is getting cold. mac’s tea, which he’ll have to drink if the idiot makes a break for it, is getting cold too.

“mac, come back, please. we can do this another time.” mac ignores him, actually starts packing a bag, so dennis has to drag himself off that chair, and walks his heavy steps toward mac, grabbing his hand, the one that’s tearing open a duffle bag. “come on,” he says, trying to sound patient. “what’s this really about?”

for a moment there, mac looks at him like he has the comprehension of a very stupid baby. “i wanna be in love, man.” 

“i know, okay, i’m sorry the air bnb thing failed, we can try it some other time, market the place to some, some hot greasy beefcakes. not greg, okay? guy was ugly as shit anyway.” 

“this, this isn’t about the air bnb, i don’t care about the air bnb!” 

“i know, i know, you wanna be in love!” dennis yells back, tired of this. “we’ll find you someone-”

“i don’t want just any bozo off the street, dennis, i want-”

“then we won’t get some bozo off the street, i said-”

“i want you!” mac exhales so loud after that. “oh my god, will you please _shut up, _dude. don’t act like you don’t know.”  
  
“i know, okay? believe me, _i know._ i’m saying this _because_ i know. and trust me, you don’t know.”

“okay now you’re confusing the fuck outta me. uh, what don’t i know?”

“you don’t want me. you want the closest thing that’s most comfortable. trust me, buddy. i know i’ve been pissed about this in the past, but i get it now. i know it isn’t your… well, i guess, fault.”

“so you don’t believe me.”

“no, i just-”

“dennis, i love you man.” the words leave mac’s lips but they stick in dennis’ throat. “i wanna be in love, because i’m-i love you. i don’t even, i don’t even think i care if that scares you off anymore.”

“if it scares me off will you stop?”

“no.”

“why the hell not?”

“because i-”

“yeah, yeah, you’re in love with me,” he groans. “fine. be in love with me. i don’t care.”

but he does.

mac scoffs. “be in love with you? all on my own? by myself dude? fuck off. i’m so tired. i’m so fucking tired i can’t do it anymore. i can’t do this. i drive myself crazy because of you. i think you hate me, i think you _love_ me, i think, i think i’m gonna die.”

“stop being so melodramatic.” 

“well, i’m sorry, dennis. i’m sorry you don’t give a shit about this, _or me,_ but, it hurts, okay? and-”

“who says i don’t give a shit about you?”

“then why won’t you say anything?”

“oh give me a _break._ you haven’t been talking to a wall or anything. i’m right fucking here.”

“you’re talking, sure, but you’re not saying shit, bro. you’re not telling me a thing.”

dennis sits down on mac’s unmade bed. he must be getting a migraine. “what, pray tell, do you want to hear from me?”

“the truth. if you don’t love me, fine, if you’re not into men, fine. tell me, dude. do something. say something. but don’t fucking lie to me. i’ll know that, at least.”

“if-” dennis hesitates. “if you can tell.” he is tempted to just run away, frankly. “does it need to be said?”

silence drapes over them, the room, a cold silence, it freezes everything around it, and now dennis is the one who wants to die. he’s said too much by not saying enough. maybe it’s not to late to say sike and proclaim his undying hatred for mac. lord knows it’s got some truth to it. mac is insufferable, he is annoying and controlling and a full on bitch. but god, dennis can’t stay away, dennis can’t even look away sometimes, and maybe that is his one flaw. 

“say stop.” 

mac shuts his eyes, leaning in. dennis doesn’t pull away. his eyes flutter then droop close, too. mac plants the softest, most chaste kiss on his lips. when he pulls away without taking things any further, dennis looks at him, not a thought in his mind. mac breathes out. “i never thought i’d get to do that.”

“so do you feel better now?” his voice is almost petty. dennis has one too many thoughts now. all of them involve mac realizing he has no interest in dennis at all and that this was all just. one big ruse. mac has what he wants, so he wants nothing more now. maybe dennis can save his dignity if he claims that letting himself get kissed was a fluke too. “can we- can we go and have that tea?”

“not if i get to keep kissing you.” dennis looks almost shocked. mac looks to the side. “can i? keep kissing you?”

dennis moves first this time. he traps mac’s lips with his own, face between his hands, pulling mac close. mac takes the hint, draws in, knee between his legs, and he moans at the contact. he inches up mac’s shirt, and mac stops kissing him to sit up, pull it off. he’s straddling dennis when he leans back in and says ‘i love you’, again, inches from his lips. this gets him going. “i love you so much,” he says, words slurred, but meaning profound. “gonna show you how much”. dennis ignores him, but those words, once nothingness, become everything now. he slowly finds himself believing.

“you’re my everything,” he says, recklessly, before the thought leaves his head and before he can reconsider and decide against. mac freezes, and then he smiles. dennis hopes mac knows this means he remembers what he said to greg too. maybe if mac is smart enough, he’ll know dennis wished mac had been talking about him back there, when he heard him dole out a dollop of sweet nothings, to that undeserving greg.

“you’re my everything too, man,” he says, making him giddy in the head, unbuttoning his jeans like it’s a contest, tugging them down with a relish. “oh my god. you’re so much bigger than greg.”

dennis goes pink. “shut up, you’ve seen my cock before.”

“i know. thought it would make you happy. and for serious, dude? it’s. shit.”

“it’s shit?”

“no, like, holy shit, it’s nice, you know?” 

dennis is almost irritated now. he’s got a throbbing hard cock and no one to suck it, you know? or pump it. or put their… ass over it? dennis isn’t really sure what mac’s gonna do here. 

just as he’s about to chastise him, mac licks down the flat of his palm and sends his hand down the side of his shaft, touching it tentatively, out of curiosity. dennis makes a very embarrassing noise, but is soon rendered unconscious of it, because tongue dances around his arousal and mac’s lips pull over it, slowly sucking him off, and dennis is more helpless than he should be, whimpering and pleading, pathetic as can be, but it doesn’t matter, it’s okay, and mac goes faster and faster and it gets wet and so, so good, and he’s crying for help, for more, for release. he grabs onto whatever he can, at some point, he grabs at mac’s leg and gets swatted at, and then he doesn’t think or remember how it happens but he gets what he’s needed for the longest time. 

“fuck,” he curses, a good minute or so after it happens, because god, he can’t believe that this happened. oh well. too late now. pretty hard to take getting your dick sucked back. 

“was that good?”

“you’re actually asking?”

mac laughs. it feels good to hear. “i was awesome, right, dennis?”

“shut up.”

“okay.” he almost loves this. mac’ll do anything he says now, at least for a good few days. 

“hey.”

mac flips his head immediately to look at him. he’d make fun of mac, except he looks beautiful, and his dick is hanging out, so maybe it’s not the time to make fun of someone with anger issues, whether he’s in love with you or not.

“yeah?”

“i-” he changes his mind. “you wanna get some tea?”

mac looks a little confused, but he nods instantly, readily. “uh, sure. if that’s what you want.” 

dennis searches for his pants and pulls it on and mac finds his top. they walk to the kitchen in silence and mac hands dennis his tea. he takes a sip. they sit down.

“i meant to say i loved you too,” dennis admits after a while, and to his surprise, mac doesn’t drop his tea, or have any outward reaction aside from his smile. 

“i know. you kinda said it earlier when you were-”

“oh.” well that’s embarrassing. 

“can we go have sex now?”

they down their tea so fast it would’ve burned their throats had it been any hotter. frankly, there was no need to finish the tea. but they do it anyway, and they scamper off to whichever room’s the closest to finish what they started. 

they’ve got the rest of their lives to start and finish things now.


End file.
